have you ever just listened to a recording of you talking and then felt terrible for anyone who’s ever had to talk to you ever
(via armyofgregs)
Strollers on Public Transit
So, I need to write about something that’s been annoying me lately for a number of reasons because that’s what I do instead of sleeping 7 hours before my flight leaves.
Why does EVERYONE bring a stroller on public transit? Today, on the bus, the driver had to turn a woman with a stroller away because there were already three strollers on and there was no more room.
When the HELL did strollers turn into fucking tanks? When I was a kid, strollers looked like this:
Maybe the fancy ones would have a bit of room underneath so you didn’t have to carry as much or some sort of brim to keep the sun off (Mine didn’t, but perhaps melanoma wasn’t as much of a concern in the early 90’s, even for blonde haired, blue eyed babies). And that was it. But you know what? I survived. My parents survived. Now, though, parents bring every single one of their child’s possessions with them on a day trip, so of course the thing needs to carry more than a packhorse. But WHY? I would like to just point out that you’re not supposed to bring your kid out for too long. They get fussy and tired really quickly and it’s cruel and unfair to cart them around for 8+ hours. Here’s a tip - if you need storage for 9,000 diapers, an entire pitcher of juice, and all of your kid’s toys and books to entertain them, you’re planning a day that’s too long for a small child.
Next issue, WHY DOES YOUR FIVE YEAR OLD CHILD NEED A STROLLER? If they are capable of walking a reasonable distance, why are you putting your kid in a stroller and taking up the space of 5 grown men on public transit? This goes back to my previous point. If your kid can’t walk as far and as long as you’re planning to go, it’s probably not a good idea to take them.
Why is there suddenly this huge movement to take your infant with you absolutely everywhere you go? Is it supposed to be some sort of empowerment for new mothers? Because really, it just seems kinda abusive to expect your small child to adhere to your filled agenda. And it’s unfair in one of the biggest cities in the country where public transit is so busy, it’s not uncommon to have to wait for another bus/train because it’s too packed.
| Parents: | -flipping through TV channels in the den, stumble across Doctor Who on BBC America- |
| -theme song comes on- | |
| Dad: | Oh...oh dear god... |
| -shuffle shuffle- | |
| -scuffle scratch scratch- | |
| -scratch CRASH scuffle BANG CRASH- | |
| Me: | -bursts through the door- I HEARD THE SONG OF MY PEOPLE. |
I love this woman.
Two Steps to a Bikini-Ready Body
1. Look in the mirror and say “Bitch, I’m fabulous.”
2. Don bikini.
PREPARED FOR SUMMER.
(Source: princessnaphthalene, via stop-the-fading)
Greatest song ever written played on ukulele? I THINK YES.
